Saints safety Malcolm Jenkins lost his cleats and a good measure of pride by being defeated in a best-of-three receiving drill by a high school player at Jenkins’ own football camp in New Jersey. Cleats are a decent prize, but it’s only fitting that the camp pays for the kid to meet with Vernon Davis over dinner where the two can share intimates tales of abusing Malcolm Jenkins on the field. Also: the Saints might give up 10,000 points this season.
— Sad news for Seahawks fans: apparently Matt Flynn has yet to overtake Tarvaris Jackson in the battle to be the Seahawks’ starting QB. Ufford says not to worry because Tarvaris is Tarvaris and all will be well. Easy to say in June. If this lingers into August, I expect homer anguish from Matt unseen since the Brian Russell days.
— Steve Smith was in Los Angeles over the weekend participating in the very Jesus-y charitable act of washing homeless people’s feet then giving them new socks and shoes. Very generous stuff, even if I can’t look at that picture without assuming Steve wants to engage in some more baby punching for old time’s sake.
— NFL Network is launching a four-hour morning show that will run every weekday beginning July 30. No word on whether there will be a atrocious fourth-hour equivalent of Hota Kotb and Kathie Lee on Today, but I’ll go ahead and assume yes and that Peter King and Matt Millen will be involved.
— The Dolphins are jumping on the iPad playbook train, but have told players they will be fined $10,000 for inappropriate usage of the device, such as tweeting and other things Ocho is probably going to do. Also, all players will be fined double if they neglect to download whatever sh*tty apps that J.Lo puts out.
— A former Baylor basketball player was arrested by FBI agents for attempting to extort RGIII. “I want 100 grand in unmarked bills or you’ll never see these Superman socks again.”
— PROGRAMMING NOTE: Burnsy and Danger Guerrero will be filling in Tuesday and Thursday while your dear editor Ape attends to some personal matters. This bikini zone isn’t gonna wax itself, you know.