Week 3 is over and everything is on fire. What was a disgusting but potentially survivable ordeal on Sunday night instantly became the nightmare scenario and ultimate comeuppance for Roger Goodell on Monday night. The man got owned by the Lingerie Football League. People all calling for the league office to mandate a reversal of the result. People are calling for The Rog’s head, more so than usual, only more pitched and with pointy objects.
Some folks undoubtedly clocked out before the madness ensued at the very end. Can’t entirely blame them. Though it was a close contest throughout by virtue of sound defense and sputtering offense, it was an extremely sloppy affair. There were a ton of penalties, half of which seems to be incorrect calls. Even without the catastrophic ending, there would have been plenty to rant about in regards to the scab ref performance.
The best moments are a mixed bag of reactions to the screw job itself, as well as some lighter fare from the game. You remember the rest of the game, right? Y’know, the stuff that happened before “the shield” by got a scabkkake facial. Let’s get to ’em.
Via Awful Announcing, here is the Packers radio call of the final play. It’s a nice slow boil from confusion to outright frothing rage.
To think, without the ending, the instance where the scab ref called a personal foul on the wrong team and the actual offending player had to come over to correct him would have been the biggest scab derp of the night. That’s not sufficiently depressing. If not this, it could have also been the ridiculous pass interference call on Sam Shields or the ergregious uncalled hold on Bruce Irvin. It’s beside the point now to quibble with any individual bad calls from the first 59:54 of that game, not only because there were so many of them , but because it’s like going over your footwork in a knife fight after getting stabbed.
I railed against Mike Tirico for apologizing for the scab refs during the Broncos-Falcons Monday night game, but he redeemed himself after the disaster last night, when the Packers were forced back out on the field for a pro forma extra point attempt. Tirico hailed their classy behavior in the face of being indefensibly jobbed. Sure, it would be difficult to not come to that conclusion at that point, but we can think of more than a few media whores who might try.
Golden Tate straight up has a Ray Lewis “oh dip, I didn’t see nothing” moment when asked by a reporter if he committed offensive pass interference on the final play, which he clearly did. But damage control is underway, both from the league and the winning team. As they say, deny deny deny.
Oooh, the searing contempt of Mike McCarthy after that game. Richer and thicker than the middle of one of his signature butter sandwiches. Presuming that is ESPNWisconsin beat writer Jason Wilde he’s lashing out at.
The ending obscures what was either a breakout night for Seattle’s defense or another great depantsing of the Packers offensive line. Either way, Aaron Rodgers was sacked eight times in the first half. He was able to stay upright a little more in the final 30 minutes. The Brandon Mebane dance you see followed a sack that was negated by his own facemask penalty against Rodgers, which is a shame because it was my favorite dance of the night.
In things not related to Scabocalpyse, Gruden was eating Skittles in the booth. Or his usual cocktail of uppers disguised as candy. Either way, nice catty comment by Tirico.
At first, I thought this was another horrible Gruden creation, but apparently the Seahawks secondary willingly applies to “Legion of Boom” nickname to themselves. That’s not quite the worst on a night like this, but consider yourself getting off easy. I did enjoy Gruden called Earl Thomas the “Road Runner” because Gruden once approached him in a furry coyote suit and he ran off.
As an obnoxious Steelers fanboy, I have a undeniable fondness for the long-tressed mid-’90s era Kevin Greene, who was an absolute monster of a pass rusher. I don’t care that he won a Super Bowl as a coach with Green Bay against Pittsburgh. There’s no not loving Kevin Greene, who should really be cutting ’80s wrestling style video promos before each week’s games.
Aaron Rodgers slipping on the turf and being angry. Football is dead but schadenfreude lives on!
Before the game, Cris Carter picked the “Seabags” to win. When the NFL has to rip itself apart and form a new league, I move for Seattle to be called the Seabags if they still can’t be the Seattle Scampi.
Failing that, I’m just use the Seabags name for douchebag Seahawks fans. These guys are definitely Seabags.
Mike Tirico tried out an always appropriate duck analogy for offensive and defensive coaches. One of them is above water while the other is below. Also, if you shoot Mike McCarthy in Duck Hunt, don’t expect that dog to try to hoist his massive corpse. That’s not right.
Fans! Being happy! Enjoying the game they love! Not having qualms about whether they should continue to watch it until the scabs are gone! We were so innocent once.
Ed Hochuli is supersetting with glee
How can someone have “off the charts intangibles”? Aren’t intangibles, by their very definition, non-quantifiable, making them un-chartable?
Tirico tired of the size thing.
Brings it up.
“Man he’s got a quick trigger” the things you learn on the Gruden Bang Bus
Mike Martz Colors Dont Run
Can someone combine that slip gif with the derpthrow he made in game 2 against the bears so I can just fap to it all night long?
Geico commercial casting is amazing. That circus peanut’s Eddie Money impression is spot-on.
I am gonna make action figures of Marshawn Lynch and Bruce Irvin and sell them on ebay and become a millionaire and buy season tickets to Seattle games and it will be SO MUCH FUN!
Dave Wannstedt would have an orgasm with all this punting
Randall “Brian Dennehy’s dirty sheriff character in Silverado was also named” Cobb. Man, Boomer’s getting esoteric
Bulaga wants to walk home
Marshawn Lynch will run the ball until the day the defense tears him in half. The buttom half will keep running and the top half will eat skittles
Holy shit. Can’t wait to read “Flutie-like” arm in Monday’s PKakke
Rodgers won’t be coming back for this half. Irvin snuck into the Green Bay locker room in a Packer jersey and snapped his neck. Ray Lewis has taken this as a personal challenge
I want this game to go into OT. So We can all hear Russell gurantee a win.
DJ Dr Fluffers
This game would go a lot faster if the refs didnt have to discount double check every call they made
Why thank you Eddie Murray Sparkles
I feel an awful similar Aaron Rogers=Andy Roddick “lost my mojo” thing happening here.
If I were a coach, I’d just chuck it down the field on every play. What’s the worst that could happen?
BREAKING NEWS: Golden Tate signed by Miami Dolphins to play DB.
Golden Tate realizes he’s not playing volleyball, right?