Via KSK commenter Gino Tourettsa comes the story of what has to be the worst NFL fan experience of all-time, even worse than people who get stabbed at Raiders games. Behold:
A friend of mine, a genuinely good guy, is at the Packers-Lions game (Sun. 12-9-12) at Lambeau Field as I type this. He’s from the unincorporated hinterlands of Iowa and has no fixed allegiance to any one NFL team, but is a fan of the game. Through his remarkable charity work, he scored luxury box tickets for this tilt. Getting to Green Bay was a bit of a hassle, but it would be a good time and he’d see a Black & Blue Division game in the snow at Lambeau, right? My buddy’s reward for selfless humanitarianism came with a nasty kick to the nuts- he’s trapped in a the suite with Larry The Cable Guy, who is a temporary Packers fan and insists on trying out new bits for his Cable Guy schtick- all within the confines of a climate-contolled luxury suite.
Just another reminder that no good deed goes unpunished. Summon your entire store of altruism for the benefit of a good cause and what happens? You get the prison of three hours stuck listening to Larry The Cable Guy testing new material. This isn’t even whatever you would consider “good” material from him. These are jokes even Larry The Cable Guy probably wouldn’t tell on stage. If there is a hell, it is this.