Jacoby Jones incorporated Ray Lewis’ spastic/squirrel dance into his routine on “Dancing With The Stars”. I resolutely against people trying to keep this going even after Ray-Ray’s retirement, though I will admit that it would be amusing to see Joe Flacco give it a shot.
— The Browns are hiding new general manager Michael Lombardi from the media, probably because he’s say something antagonistic and stupid and therefore distract from the team’s ongoing mission to churn out sadness.
— Brett Favre helped recruit Greg Jennings to the Vikings, so another reason for Minnesota fans to hate Brittfar once Jennings tears a hammy in Week 3.
— I had to Google who The Saturdays are, but they’re attractive and were recently photographed wearing Aaron Rodgers and Charles Woodson jerseys. I guess that means the one on the left and the one in the center were just cut from the group. Diddums, girls.
— Jeffrey Lurie is pushing for Philadelphia to host a Super Bowl if the one in New York in a success (e.g. whiny sportswriters don’t make us regret it with their complaints about the cold). I’m fine with that. The biggest negative for a Philadelphia Super Bowl is the possibility of Eagles fans in attendance. In fact, the infusion of Philly fans hating on both teams could be a shot in the arm. It’ll break up the polite, corporate atmosphere that usually detracts from the game.
— The Colts are signed Matt Hasselbeck, recently dumped by the Titans in favor of Ryan Fitzpatrick, to a two-year deal. If that’s not a motivating slight, I don’t know what is.
— The Jets are considering adding Kevin Kolb. Quit thinking on it and do it. Do it, Jets, for the hilarity of a nation.
— Mike Tomlin on the read-option: “We look forward to stopping it. It’s the flavor of the month and we look forward to eliminating it.” Yeah, you can totally do with slow-ass LaMarr Woodley as your best pass rusher.
— For obvious reasons, Bob Kraft still loves the Tuck Rule and will probably abstain from the vote to eliminate it. He also has a photo of the infamous play from the 2001 playoffs signed by Jon Gruden with the message: “It was a fumble.”
— The Cowboys and Dolphins are this year’s participants in the Hall of Fame game. Sad state of affairs that this made me excited for a second before remembering the game is basically one drive with starters at half speed.