Last week I warned you about the dangers of false-flag fun control policys and right on target the NFL announced that they are creating a FUN FREE ZONE in the parking lot surrounding Superbowl XXLXCIUX-whatever. When you create a fun free zone thats the first place people are going to go have fun you idiot. The organizers quickly realized the error of there ways, and as the fans reacted violently they tried to walk it back folks:
Contrary 2 reports, there is no ban on TLG8ing at SBXLVIII. Just can’t bring grills or take up an empty pkg space.
— Frank Supovitz (@SupEvents) December 9, 2013
Phew that was a close one, So were allowed to tailgate as long as we dont tailgate. Here are some other things that will be “permissable” during Superbowl Sunday:
- Taking a shower with a raincoat on
- Drinking Michelobe Ultra through a straw
- Asking me to politeley hush when Im going bonkers making some NOIZE during the 9/11 tribute
- Sliding down stadium ralings on the FIRST floor
- Eat your own food that you brought from home instead of the other guy whose got ribs and isnt closely monitoring whose at his party
- Keeping your shirt on at all times
- Bringing your wife
Can you imagine if they tried to tell New Oleanites last year that you couldnt stand next to a car drinking beer and cooking with a open flame? They woudnt just shoot the messanger theyd stuff his ass inside like frog intestines little by little and fry him in donut oil for violating the first 2 amendments in there state constitution.
NFL fans were like a powderkeg after all this flag-football and “concussion” stuff Goodells been pulling, and this might be the murdering of the King of Germany that sets the revolution in order. And come Febuary 2nd All Might Be Quiet on the Western Front, but New York might be burning folks. I say REAL NFL fans show up to this tailgate with there grills, radios, cornholes, coolers, coozys, and kegs and show the NFL how we party. We can bascially shut down the parking lot if enough of us revolt and Roy brings his smoker. Remember, we pay there salaries, not the other way around. Its time to take our national pastime back, and here is the national anthem that will ring from coast to coast:
TAILGATETING AT THE SUPERBOWL,
SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING HOLE,
TALKIN PIGSKIN WITH SOME NEW FRIENDS