Bears Fans Can’t Handle A Measly Tornado

11.17.13 4 years ago 5 Comments


For a fanbase that prides itself on its toughness, you wouldn’t expect something like a little rain and also 30 degree winds and also hail and also lightning and also a tornado warning to force them out of Soldier Field.  Alas, in anticipation of a teensy weensy devastating storm, Soldier Field was evacuated and the Bears/Ravens game was delayed due to weather following a Ray Rice touchdown.

At press time, Mike Ditka was the only man left in Soldier Field, wearing a leather football helmet and pads, screaming at the leaving masses “if you pussies won’t finish this game, I’ll do it for you!” before picking up the football and passing the ball to what can only be assumed were Ditka’s own imaginary recreations of the ’85 Bears’ receiving corps.

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