Hey, thanks to Tony Wyllie, Bruce Allen, Larry Michael, Lanny Davis or whoever the hell Dan Snyder pays to listen to him whine about those jerks in the liberal media. Because now some of us have jackets. And I think one guy got a backhoe? Either way, Native Americans are definitely having the Best Week. And sure, people are going to point out that Snyder could have set up the Original Americans Foundation anytime in the last 15 years. But how many coats have those people given out to combat their white guilt?
Instead of sitting up high on the banks of the Patawomeck River, Snyder spent his winter coming out to the reservations to find out how we feel. And what he took away from his series of trips is that we are COLD. And he’s right. It gets bitterly fucking cold in Oklahoma. Which yes, means RED PEOPLE. Not because our people like being called red skins, but because when white people show up in winter the wind makes their skin redder than a baboon’s ass.
Once again, Ray Rice is having the Worst Week. The Ravens running back and part time casino co-ed boxing champ was initially charged with simple assault-domestic violence. Now word comes down that he’s being indicted for the big boy crime of third-degree aggravated assault. If convicted he could face 3-5 years in jail. But still, gotta audi alteram partem, as they say in law school. Probably.
Top image via WaPo.