Celebration Day: Zeppelin on stage, MNF

12.10.07 10 years ago 56 Comments
Only one of these beloved dinosaurs is getting boatloads of cash from the NFL & ESPN

Led Zeppelin’s transcontinental renaissance kicks into high gear with their reunion concert tonight in London. While over on our side of the ocean, Zeppelin has inked a promotional deal with the NFL and ESPN. Which explains why you heard “Dazed and Confused” in the background on last Monday night while the referees were ass-raping the Ravens’ defense with gusto.

When Unsilent Majority heard about Zeppelin’s deal he expressed unbridled optimism that this arrangement might lead to to the band playing at half-time of the Super Bowl. Since Maj is the wide-eyed naif of our collective, he doesn’t understand that Led Zeppelin doesn’t play half-time shows. If anything, the Super Bowl should be played at intermission of a Led Zeppelin show.

The six of us put our heads together to predict what Zep tunes our favorite NFL personalties would request. We know, you’re thinking, “great, another crappy list post.” But it was either this or I break out my theramin while Drew dons his unbuttoned half-shirt ala Robert Plant. NOW CRANK IT UP, FUCKERS!!!

Minnesota Vikings ______________________ Going to California

Trent Green _______________________ Dazed and Confused

Bill Belichick _____________________________ No Quarter

Travis Henry _______________________________ Moby Dick

Jason Campbell’s mom _________________ Black Country Woman

Sterling Sharpe /John Madden _________________ Ramble On

Devin Hester _______________________ How Many More Times

Bart Scott _________________ Nobody’s Everyone’s Fault But Mine

Andre Gurode _____________________ Trampled Under Foot

Albert Haynesworth ______ Bron-Y-Aur Stomp (Ha-Y-Nes Worth Stomp?)

Cam Cameron ________________________ The (Cleo) Lemon Song

Vinny Testeverde _______________________ Achilles Last Stand

Jeff Garcia ________________________ In Through the Out Door

New Orleans Saints _________________ When the Levee Breaks (ouch)

Tony Romo’s Mom ________________________ Living Loving Maid

Gene Upshaw _________ Black Dog (submitted by Bryant Gumbel)

Michael Irvin ________________________ Hats Off to (Alvin) Harper

Kurt Warner ___________________________ Houses of the Holy

Earl Campbell _________________________ Wearing and Tearing

Travis Johnson ___________________________ You Shook Me

Donovan McNabb ___________________________ Sick Again

Rex Ryan _____________________ Communication Breakdown

Chad Johnson ____________________________ Dancing Days

Rex Grossman/Kyle Orton__What Is And What Should Never Be (nice jinx, Punter)

Joe Gibbs ______________________ How Many More Time(out)s

Elisha Manning ____________________________ She’s Just a Woman

Sav Rocca________________________________ Immigrant Song

Patriots, Dolphins ____________________ Good Times, Bad Times

Heinz Field _______________________________ The Rain Song

Shawne Merriman _________Physical Graffiti

Andy Reid _________________________________ Custard Pie

Bill Parcells __________________________ Babe I’m Gonna Leave You

Marvin Lewis __________________________ Hey Hey What Can I Do

Jon Kitna ____________________________ Stairway to Heaven

Al Davis ___________________________ In My Time of Dying

NBC’s ‘green’ coverage producers___________________ Ozone Baby

Kevin Kolb __________________________ Your Time Is Gonna Come

Aikman appears to have a large faggot on his back. Hmmmm……

Usually, this is the part where we invite the commenters to add their own suggestions. But we have already RAWKED THEIR FACES OFF !!!!
(Makes metal fingers m/ m/ bangs head).

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