Commenter Draft: Expensive Item We Wish Cost Only $5

05.15.09 8 years ago 229 Comments

This week’s commenter draft is expensive items that should cost only $5.  The only caveat: your picks must be ACTUAL items that people buy.  No picking abstract things, such as stocks or companies or football teams.  As always, pick once, then wait ten picks before selecting again.

I’ll kick things off with this:


That’s right: every living quarters in the world should be $5.  Penthouse on Park Avenue?  Five bucks.  Mansion overlooking the ocean?  Five bucks.  Fucking Neuschwanstein?

Fünf Dollar.

Why?  Because FUCK REALTORS, that’s why.  The cockroaches of humankind.  I’d sooner fuck the zoo animal of your choice than a realtor.  And let me expand that capital-F fuck you to EVERYONE in the real estate business: contractors, brokers, landlords, landscapers, building managers, housing inspectors… DIE.  Yeah, I want a house for five bucks, but even more than that I want your entire industry to get a tree branch rammed up its asshole.

Your picks in the comments.

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