Donovan McNabb Says RGIII Is Brainwashed

08.14.13 4 years ago 54 Comments


Donovan McNabb has been repeatedly critical of the relationship between Mike Shanahan and Robert Griffin III over the course of the past year, which is in no way sour grapes over the way McNabb’s tenure with the team went.

Nevertheless, McNabb believes he could be a useful mentor for young Robert. He made a public offer to RGIII and his dad a few months ago to discuss the career path of the NFL’s Bono, an offer that was tersely rebuffed in a recent GQ feature.

Of course, there’s no reason a quarterback wouldn’t want counsel from a living legend like Donovan McNabb unless they were being brainwashed. At least that’s the conclusion that McNabb came to.

“I’m just trying to help him. Clearly the young generation, they think they have all the answers. He’s going through a little turmoil right now, trying to make it out on the field, and it’s unfortunate. But that’s where we’re at right now as far as these young quarterbacks who think they have all the answers. Until things start to fall apart and come down trembling on you, then you want some help. But it’s a shame. I honestly think that over there in Washington, he’s getting brainwashed. He’s getting input from whoever it may be on, ‘There’s no reason to talk to him, it didn’t work out here.’ If they expressed their dislike when I was there, or what I used to do, so be it. But, I hope the best for the young man, but the direction he’s going in is really a direction he does not want to do. He does not want to go there with me, especially when I got the last word.”

At this point, it’s obvious what must be done. A daring rescue team must sweep into Redskins training camp, extract RGIII and spirit him away to an undisclosed location where he can spend weeks being deprogrammed of Mike Shanahan’s heinous mental conditioning. Only then will RGIII be ready to accept Donovan McNabb’s quarterback lessons of one-hopping receivers and being too fat to run a two-minute drill.

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