Each U.S. President According to Their Assumed NFL Allegiance

03.13.13 5 years ago 85 Comments

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A Uni Watch reader named Alec Tolivaisa submitted this Photoshop of NFL jerseys for each U.S. president. The allegiances were assigned based on which team it’s presumed each POTUS would root for given where he grew up. Some of the designations are somewhat contentious, since some hail from places that skirt the territory lines of another fan base, but for the most part it’s fairly accurate.

A few thoughts:

— The Browns lead to league in assassinated presidents!

— Everyone knows Gerald Ford played football for Michigan, so it’s not a surprise he got the Lions. Still, it’s standard procedure that the Lions receive all Ford-related things.

— Taft could still start at left guard for the Bengals.

— Eisenhower died less than a year before his (not really his) Chiefs won their only Super Bowl title. Sounds about right.

— George W. Bush as a Cowboys fan is a little iffy, but it works in some ways. On one hand, very fitting because Dubya thinks he was a cowboy and owned another sports franchise in that market. But no chance he roots for a different team than his dad. Also, Dubya also spent a considerable part of his upbringing in tony New England prep schools, so he could be down with the Patriots, too. It would at least gibe with the Patriot Act passing under his administration. Also, it would piss off a bunch of Northeast liberals, so that’s kind of fun.

— The Bears have Lincoln, Reagan and Obama. SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE!

— Though JFK’s Boston connection is unquestioned, in his adulthood, Kennedy had a well-documented hard-on for Vince Lombardi’s Packers teams. NAWT A REAL GREATRIOTS FAN!

— Herbert Hoover works as a Raiders fan because Raiders fans live in shantytowns.

— Obama should really have a Bears Pro Bowl jersey because Hawaii.

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