Are you f*cking kidding us with this, SI? Did you learn nothing from being embarrassed by Manti Te’o? Holy sh*t, everything is the worst.
Does anyone actually think SI is any good and relevant still? They not only not have any good writers, they bestow a shitload of money on PK. SI is the worst.
Don Banks’ OK. The rest DDONNNNNNNNNNNN’TTTTT CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAREEEE
1. No, God does not care.
2. If He did care, He sure as shit wouldn’t be rooting for an alleged murderer who makes a showy point of wearing his religion on his sleeve like a fucking Pharisee.
He DOES care! But FUCK those starving African babies.
1. No, God does not care.
QED, Catler is god
So he’s praying in a pool of blood…
Or a PED. And as per the sports media that’s way worse than murder.
/orders a “Stabby Linebacker”
//explains it’s a vodka and cranberry, with Grey Goose
///explains that Grey Goose is an overrated vodka
I’ll take two (double fist)
This is my new favourite drink. By far. I mean, not to drink, but definitely to order.
So the Josh Brent Mary with a celery fashioned to resemble a steering column is a no go?
SI never answers the hard hitting questions like ESPN the magazine. WHAT IF RAY LEWIS WAS WHITE?1!?
Seriously, do sports writers have to deify EVERY player that gives them a good quote? I can’t wait until Ray murders someone after retirement (because what else can you do without football?) and the media just goes crazy on him. No one learned their lesson from previous false idols such as Tiger, Lance, Te’o, etc… Ray had the foresight to fuck up first, THEN act like the world’s greatest family man/religious prophet. Because morons like Whitlock will keep picking apart something as inconsequential like Te’o’s fake gf story, but when it comes to Ray’s swiss cheese alibi “Oh, I love me some Ray Ray! He was acquitted, what more do you want?” Casey Anthony and OJ agree.
Even with the plea bargain he was still found guilty of obstruction of justice. Mother fucker is a criminal in every sense.
I thought the plea bargain was his acknowledging obstruction. Was he convicted of that in addition to something else?
@0tarin: A plea bargain is still a conviction. It’s just a way to reduce the sentence by admitting that you would be convicted if the state had to spend the time and money getting through a trial.
Fair enough. I’m a well-dressed dog, not a lawyer. I was just confused by the “even with” phrasing of it, I suppose.
Sad attempt at getting morons to buy their magazines is sad.
It’s funny because if you believe in God then you know that Ray Lewis isn’t going to meet him in the afterlife. TOTES LOL!
Not unless he truly repents! /protestantism’d
Not only is the cover headline a hacky, shameless attempt to sell magazines with no real content, but it’s a rerun. Sports Illustrated ran EXACTLY THE SAME HEADLINE before the Packers-Broncos Super Bowl 16 years ago.
Reading that article makes me realize that 70% of Americans are REALLY fucking stupid as opposed to 90% of them being sort of dumb.
This country blows so much ass sometimes. Thanks, Obama.
I have a job and it does fulfill my wildest fantasies about working. Thanks, Obama.
Did SI get an answer from God as to whether He/She/It cares who wins the Super Bowl? Because that would be the get of the century.
PK was on the Charlie Rose show last night talking about the Super Bowl. I did not watch for long, but I did hear him use the word “stallion.”
in the above, spray-spray seems to be enjoying the overlook hotel
The hairline/scalp. It’s decidedly, um, not a shiny globe. Is SI doing glamour shot touch ups now?
Ever seen the swimsuit issue? SI may have invented glamour shot touch ups.
This Ray Lewis, I call him God’s linebacker because he reaped 10,000 foreskins with the jawbone of an ass.
I wonder if they recycled the ‘Does God really care?’ article from ’96 in this week’s SI. That’d be funny and not really surprising.
Spray Spray: “Please let me finish peeing”
Galilean wedding invitee: “Fuck. Hey Jesus, do that thing again on this Koi pond.”
So the red water is a lot warming by Ray-Ray?