Hi! Billy Mays Here For The St. Louis Rams, The Portable Pro Football Team!

06.01.09 8 years ago 25 Comments


It’s the NFL team that moves WHEREVER YOU WANT. 

With the NFL Rams, there’s no more hopes of turning the corner for that championship season! No more flamboyant marquee players! With the NFL Rams, it’s DEFEAT AND REPEAT!

Tired of rooting for a loser in a market where nobody cares about pro football? NOW WITH THE NFL RAMS, you can pick up your team and go wherever you want! Los Angeles! Las Vegas! London! Monterrey! The NFL Rams work ANYWHERE YOU CAN SUBSIDIZE A NEW STADIUM! You’ll get the players if you can screw the taxpayers!

The NFL Rams allows YOU THE UNIQUE ABILITY to root for whatever team YOU WANT. Root for the Rams, or cheer for the visiting team! Or do what most St. Louis fans do…AND DON’T CHEER AT ALL! You’ll never be tiring  OF PLAY SO UNINSPIRING!

CALL NOW and receive the RAMS’ storied, 73-year-old franchise RIGHT NOW! For the low, low price of 939 million dollars! But wait! Act now and I’ll triple the offer! We’ll also include the CFL’s Hamilton Tiger Cats and the New Orleans Voodoo of the Arena Football League ABSOLUTELY FREE!

BUT WAIT! Call in the next 20 minutes and we’ll throw in 2005 NFL Most Valuable Player Shaun Alexander! A 2o-dollar value! Yours, ABSOLUTELY FREE!

Here’s how to order!

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