KSK Celebrity Pickkake: Butters Stotch

01.28.09 9 years ago 37 Comments

The celebrity Super Bowl pick is a time-honored tradition, one we at KSK are super fucking excited to be a part of, as we have in the past. For the next two weeks, stars from the world of entertainment, politics, and more will drop by to make their picks for the big game in Tampa! Up next, it’s South Park’s Butters!

Well, golly gee gingersnaps fellas, it sure is a big honor to be asked to give you my prediction of what’s gonna happen in the big game. Hooo weee, Super Bowl Sunday, it really is somethin’, ain’t it?

I wish it wouldn’t start so darn late though. Last year I only got to stay up until halftime before my parents made me go nighters. Boy, I sure was steamed. The guys at school said it had a good ending and everything. Speaking of my parents, you’re not planning on using my pick for gambling, are you? Cause if my parents find out I’m wrapped up with the sharks, they’ll ground me for sure.

The game? I do like an underdog and those Cardinals are as underdog as you can get. They have had it rough over the years. Been kicked around by just about everybody. I know that’s no fun. If their fans love their team like I love my Denver Broncos, that’s gotta be one big jackboot to the chompers on a daily basis.

So I’m thinking Arizona is gonna come out on top, because that’ll make Jesus happy and the Cardinals fans will have a reason to hold their heads high. It sure will be swell.

If I had to guess a score, I’d…Hold on, I think I hear my mom calling me.

[Runs around corner]


It is I, P-Professor Chaos. I care not for weak, timid little underdogs. I want to see them ground into the ashes of failure. I foresee Kurt Warner fumbling the opening snap, Larry Fitzgerald twisting his ankle and his sportswriting dad having to chronicle the whole thing.

Those big bad Steelers will crush your pitiful dreams of respectability. And chaos reigns across the land. An age of discord and all sorts of other badness. I will laugh heartily to behold it.


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