Please Everybody Tell Joe Flacco That He Is Pretty

01.12.12 6 years ago 45 Comments

The Ravens are days away from hosting a home playoff game for the first time in five years and who do they have to thank for it? Ray Rice? Terrell Suggs? Haloti Ngata? Ed Reed? Yes, mainly those guys. But also Joe Flacco, who has quietly become a downright capable NFL starter most of the time. Though he’s on the verge of becoming a very noisy capable NFL starter with delusions of grandeur. Nevertheless, in Flacco’s mind, being just about adequate is something deserving of high praise and recognition lest a QB be forced to unleash a great media-scolding through huffy press conference passive aggression.

“If you look at the teams that won, yeah you can look at the quarterbacks but that’s just because you guys, ESPN, everybody wants to pump them up as being the best quarterback that year. It’s really going to come down to what team is the best,” Flacco said. “I’m sure if we win, I’ll have nothing to do with why we won according to you guys. It is what it is. We’re going to do our best to try to win it and it doesn’t really matter what the reason is.”

REEEEEERRRR! Another tragedy of Tebow-slurping: it leads the other quarterbacks in the bottom half of the league in completion percentage and passer rating to believe they should get their due.

“I don’t care if people look at it that way. I don’t necessarily see it that way,” Flacco said. “You guys want everybody to be Aaron Rodgers and be Tom Brady, but you guys do realize, those guys’ [teams] don’t run the ball?


“If we try to do that, the criticism that we’d take around here would be ridiculous. We could win eight games like that and we could lose one and you guys would be like, ‘Oh man, what are you guys doing?’ This is what you guys said you wanted and if you lose one game, oh my God. You guys got to remember that. You guys want an elite quarterback. You have to stop complaining when we go out there and throw the ball 60 times a game.’”

No, Joe, that criticism would be incredibly valid. For you see, Ray Rice is a top-five running back. Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers are top-five quarterbacks. When the Patriots and Packers execute pass-heavy offenses, they are playing to their strength, just as the Ravens are when they lock Cam Cameron in a tool shed and actually stick with running the ball. Remember that Monday night loss to Jacksonville when Ray Rice only got eight carries and Flacco got 38 pass attempts? I do. It was hilarious.

I’ll grant that Flacco is decent enough to be a winner in the postseason and if the Ravens are actually to win the Super Bowl, ol’ Bert will have probably had to drop a bomb or two to Torrey Smith. But that’s not happening unless the running game is also working well in tandem. Jeebus, you finally get a QB to move out of his parents house, and he wants to world to hand him a big old medal.

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