Real life transcript of conversation between Jimmy Haslam and the homeless guy

05.09.14 4 years ago 28 Comments


By now youve heard the story straight out of a Disney movie. Well one of the Disney movies were everyones still racist and railroad bulls beat the hell out of hobos in a cartoon. The Browns owner and part-time felony investigation-receiver Jimmy Haslam said that he finally decided that the Browns should pick Johnny Football “Manziel” after being approached on a street by a homeless guy.

To be fair it could of been the mayor of Cleveland or any number of the Bone Thugs, but nonetheless this tramp gave Haslam the sage advice necessary to trade down, pick someone else, then trade up later to take Manziel. Heres how it all went down:

Haslam: (Walking down the street through greater Cleveland theres a homeless guy on the corner as per Cleveland tradition) Why good morning oldtimer!

Homeless guy 1: The city of Clevland desperatley needs money to maintain its homesless shelters and facilitys.

Haslam: (Pretends not to of heard him. Keeps walking. Runs into a nother homeless guy) Why good morning fair sport! Lovley Cleveland weather were having isnt it? (coughs real bad, theres seriously literally a huge body of water that is honestly on fire behind him)

Homeless guy 2: (Throws up bile) The hosptal wont treat me any more on account of Im in there too much.

Haslam: Toodle-oo!!!

Haslam strolls into work were he has about 2 dozen federal subpeonas that he hangs from all the toilet paper rolls in the Browns washroom fascilities.  Theres a knock at his door.

Haslam: Come in!

Its Rob Chudzinski. No serously the old coach of the Browns was named Rob Chudzinkski. That is the most Browns name of all time he should of been coach for life IMO. Anyways Rob Chudzkinski walks in.

Haslam: Rob! How can I help you?

Rob Chudzinski: Im just here to pick up my last check.

Haslam: Say Rob, now that Ive got you here. Who would you pick up in the f1rst round of the NFL draft?

Rob Chudzinski: Id take Manziel.


So there you have it folks. Thats the tale of the magic homeless man who visted Jimmy Haslam. What a world we live in,!

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