Roger Goodell wrote a letter to the players. We made fun of it. Poorly.
Click to embiggen.
I like the part where it says “National Football League.” It’s very understated.
What goes unsaid is the NFL is in tons better (financial) shape than say the NBA. It’s not like these assholes are LOSING money. No, they just want to make MORE money. Which I don’t deny anyone the right to do, but sheesh. How much is enough ?
That dyke reporter was right. Sue these fekkers.
Did he sign this letter in crayon or in shit-smudge?
I thought I was special when I got an email from The Grand Ginger Saturday.
It would have been more intimidating if he typed it “justified” format. It would look all I.R.S.’y and shit.
“If you die, we can draft someone else that looks just like you.”
Pfff. Ginger please. You could never draft a scab as dreamy as **Tom Brady**.
If you die, we can draft someone else that looks just like you.
with a faster 40 time. Which totally matters. Except when it doesn’t.
you forgot the secretary dictation at the bottom, it should read:
“Pfff. Ginger please. You could never draft a scab as dreamy as **Tom Brady**.”
I don’t know. I’d bet Mark Warburg would do this. He’s already played a scrappy scab football player in a movie. How hard could it be to do it for real?
no comic sans?
/doesn’t mean that in the way that is shown on the porn site I just looked at….
I, of course, meant Mark Wahlberg. That Mark Warburg is a total douche.
What bothers me is how all these media outlets are just playing the role of NFL shill nowadays. Suck a dick, Florio and the rest of the PFT staff.
Actually, what bothers me more is that the average American is a dumb redneck who will look at Goodell’s letter and believe it’s the players who are being the greedy shit stains.
What bothers me is how all these media outlets are just playing the role of NFL shill nowadays.
No surprise, really. Media outlets are big businesses, just like the NFL is big business. One hand washes the other, especially when most of those media outlets have giant billion dollar fuck off contracts to broadcast NFL games. They have every incentive to try and force a quick and favorable outcome for the owners.
have giant billion dollar fuck off contracts
Where do I sign? Is crayon alright?
“He’s already played a scrappy scab football player in a movie.”
Scrappy? Yes. Scab? No. You’ve mistaken Mark for Keanu Reeves, which is quite an accomplishment.
I don’t know why he doesn’t just have Congress cut the balls off the players union so they have to take whatever the NFL feels like giving them. Apparently, that’s how negotiations with unions are done nowadays.
Slash: because then the MLBPA would collectively poop its pants in a nationwide “brown noise” event that would threaten the ozone layer.
Mark Wahlberg is no dreamboat.
I think Congress would be really conflicted. I mean they normally side with big business and billionaires of course, but technically the players are also in the upper 1% of income. I’m not sure they feel comfortable conducting class warfare against fellow high earners.
Of course now that the players are technically unemployed, maybe Congress will feel better about fucking them over.
I think the real thing that we’re forgetting about here is, “HOW CAN THE ROG SURVIVE ON A MEAGER $1 A DAY SALARY!?!?! That is about a seventeeth (1/17) of the cost of my cinnanutmegchococremeapistachiominorityblood trenta!!!”
Peter King has promised to bring him cookies and juice (not jews), of course he will expense it to SI, but still.
No one can possibly satirize that Goodell letter better than Chris Kluwe posted on his Twitter today.
Bullshit. Are you trying to tell me that Tebow, in the name of Jesus of course, won’t scab it up?
Rog will survive on tips from breaking up random bar fights. It will be like retarded “Batman” if Batman was weak, stupid and sunburned.And he could go eat chlli with PK every day for energy. PK in fact could be Alfred the Butler type, but without anything useful except expensive coffee. Thnink Sancho Panza but more delusional.
But not at Chili’s! I mean, who knew a restaurant called Chili’s with a GIANT chili pepper in its logo wouldn’t serve chili con carne. WHAT A COUNTRY!
Better telling them what’s feasible for them to have rather than handing out gift after gift with other people’s money. But then again, the players arent quite so heavily subsidized as those halfass “teachers” in Wisconsin! Comparing the union sich in the NFL to wisconsin or NJ is totally apples and oranges, at least in the NFL’s case there has always been people on both sides of the negotiating table, unlike these public sector unions who have had their negotiations with two parties on the same side of the table and the people that foot the bill (taxpayers) arent even allowed in the room, much less have a seat at the table.
But that’s okay, apples and oranges are both fruit, so correlate away *rolleyes*
That is either good trolling or one of the most ignorant comments I’ve read on this site. Well done either way.
My rule of thumb is always to first assume “troll” or at least that its an attempt at humor. The alternative, that there really are people that dumb all over the Internet, is just too goddamn depressing.
But Nerd; I have to FIX the internet!!
“Honey; come to bed, it’s late.”
“Not now dear; someone else is wrong on the internet!”
Anyway; it’s just that most of the Kommontariat bring better shit than that.