Seahawks defensive end Michael Bennett might have scored a touchdown on Monday in the win over the Saints, but that doesn’t necessarily make him a star in Seattle. Case in point, he claims he tried to get a reservation at an upscale restaurant on Tuesday and was turned down. It wasn’t until he impersonated teammate Russell Wilson that he got a response and a very prompt one at that.
“They told me they were all booked up,” Bennett said in a 710 ESPN radio interview.
Undeterred, Bennett had an alternate plan of action.
“I called them back a few minutes later,” he said. “I said, ‘Hey, this is Russell Wilson. I’ll be attending your restaurant today. Do you have any tables?’
“And she was like, ‘Yes! We can make a table for you! You were 22-for-30 the other night, 130 quarterback rating!’ She knew every stat.”
Bennett changed his voice when he called the second time, although his Wilson impression on the radio didn’t sound much like his teammate. Bennett raised his voice a little and tried to sound cerebral.
Tried to sound… PRECOCIOUS?
Even though he looks nothing like Wilson and therefore might be turned away, Bennett was so convinced he’d fooled the restaurant he brought his entire family with him to claim the table. If the restaurant has a problem, let them try to remove an NFL defensive end, right?
“I got to the restaurant with my wife and kids,” Bennett said. “I said, ‘Oh, thank you. I’m Russell Wilson.’ She was like, ‘Good joke.’ I said, ‘Gotcha.’ ”
Bennett and his family still got the star treatment.
“She took me to the table and they had it roped off,” Bennett said. “They had sparkling water and everything.”
That is the star treatment. Only ELITE quarterbacks get sparkling water. When Matt Schaub goes to restaurants, a kitchen hand just scoops runoff from the gutter and drops it in a Styrofoam cup for him. After spitting in it, of course.