Shut Up Already, ’72 Dolphins

08.20.13 4 years ago 49 Comments


The ’72 Miami Dolphins finally get their trip to the White House 40 years after finishing the only undefeated season of the modern era. They missed their chance to visit in 1973 because the Nixon administration was otherwise busy being embroiled in the Watergate scandal.

In most cases, this would be a feel-good story for a set of people who were unduly deprived of a customary trapping of victory, but this is the ’72 Dolphins, the attention whoringist champs that there ever was. Yes, I know, this is the only undefeated team of the Super Bowl era, so they’re a little different than, say, the ’02 Buccaneers. Still, you think a White House visit is going to be enough to satisfy this team’s need to be in the limelight? No, it’ll just encourage them to be even bigger jackasses in the future and make a big deal of their stupid toast that they do when each season the last undefeated team takes a loss.

Former Dolphins tight end Marv Fleming has spent the past 15 years writing letters and talking to public officials trying to get some presidential attention for his old team.

“Every year, I’d see another team, somebody else going to the White House and not us,” Fleming said. “Why not us?”

BECAUSE THERE WAS A BAD SET OF CIRCUMSTANCES, OKAY? That’s why not. You still won the Super Bowl. Not only that, you won the Super Bowl as an UNDEFEATED TEAM. You got your rings. You got the glory. Shouldn’t that be good enough that you don’t have to harass your Congressman about wasting the president’s time with another pointless ceremony?

Naturally, there are stupid Mercury Morris quotes about the occasion. There’s no way there wouldn’t be.

Oh, and just to make it even more of a clusterf*ck, there are ’72 Dolphins players who won’t attend because of political bullshit.

In a recent column for Florida’s Sun Sentinel, Hyde, who’s also written two books about the undefeated Dolphins, quotes three members of the team saying they plan to skip the ceremony with President Barack Obama for political reasons.

So yeah, you’re welcome, guys.

Finally, for those Patriots fans who will chime up and say their team could have spared us this, your players would have been just as bad if not worse. Plus, at least the ’72 Dolphins will die sooner.

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