The Mobius strip of awkward white guys.
Surely you’ve heard by now that with yesterday’s dramatic T.J. YATES TIME last-minute win in Cincinnati, the Texans clinched the AFC South title, marking the team’s first playoff appearance in its 10-year history. We poke a lot of fun at Houston, not because the city is basically Indianapolis plus stifling humidity and oppressive traffic, but because no one ever really took their team seriously. Not that you really should start, because they’re pretty likely to lose their first playoff game. But at least the Texans can start to shake the perception that they might actually be a lazily made user-generated team on Madden. The super generic name never helped.
I’m sure if I lived closer to Houston, I’d find plenty of reasons to hate them, but the Texans fans that I’ve encountered on the Internet are adorable. They’re always so excited that anyone is even paying attention to them. “WHAT?! TEXANS?! IN PRIMETIME!? WOOHOOO! I DON’T CARE IF THEY LOSE! SOMEONE WILL NOTICE US!”
So you cute widdle happy Corgi Texans fans have fun with your playoff appearance. Tell ’em, Mini Mark Sanchez.