While the ol’ ball and chain tools about town in her fleet of Mercedes, the Wolfman has something a little more his speed: a 1999 Ford Econoline Conversion Van. It’s every bit the sketchy dungeon of filth and smelly moistness we would expect out of Rob Ryan, so of course he speaks of it as lovingly as PK would of Allagash.
If you haven’t watched this video, I cannot stress enough that you must stop everything, quit your job, leave your family and spend the next four months viewing it on loop. Because the video hosted on the Cowboys official website (!!!) doesn’t include an embed option, I’ve included the version above from YouTube in which someone made the obvious connection to the classic Chris Farley “van down by the river” sketch and spliced the two together. Here’s the genuine article, in case you would like unbroken distilled Wolfman character. UPDATE: SportsGrid has an embeddable version, if you’re so interested. I’m too lazy to swap them out now. #Fridays