Writing a parody of a song called “#Selfie” is hard, because the fact that there is a song called #Selfie in the top 40 is already a joke in its own right. But you could probably do better than the Washington Redskins cheerleaders, who have released the worst video in the history of the universe (congrats, Avril, you’re off the hook) with “#WRCSelfie.”
The song claims to be a parody of the original, but I struggle to see how that’s the case. The song doesn’t skewer the original in any way, shape, or form. It embraces the vacuousness of the source material in every way, merely replacing awkward dialogue about booty calls with really really awkward dialogue that is tangentially related to football. It’s basically the exact same painfully stupid song, except made a million times worse because the people behind it were trying to be funny. Somehow, the use of Comic Sans at the end is only like the 17th worst thing about this. I somehow made it through all three minutes and 23 seconds of this horror show, but I don’t expect that of you. You can spend that time listening to something more sophisticated, like “the Super Bowl Shuffle,” or the immortal “Ram It,” which is a goddamn masterpiece compared to this.
Of course, Dan Snyder and company might not care how awful the video is, because we’re making fun of the Redskins for reasons that don’t involve Dan Snyder or the name Redskins. So, in order to snuff out that problem, let’s agree on three things:
– Dan Snyder is awful
– The phrase “Washington Redskins Original Americans Foundation” is hilariously stupid
– This video is the dumbest thing that Redskins have done this year that doesn’t involve the phrase “Washington Redskins Original Americans Foundation”