If you lived in the Game of Thrones universe, you’d probably do your very best to stay away from parties of any kind (especially weddings). But in the real world, the one in which GoT is just a show (just a show?!?!) and you’re still mad at George R.R. Martin for not yet finishing the books, there’s nothing more fun than getting together with friends and characters with a long-ass names get murdered one after another. The only dilemma? What should you drink while watching evil kings and pregnant women be sliced to ribbons in glorious HD?
Sure, you could drink this GoT inspired beer to quench your thirst as you watch Arya get stabbed real hard and still somehow miraculously recover, but what if you wanted to go classier, fancier, more official? Fortunately for all of us, HBO and Vintage Wine Estates have come together to release three new wines — a chardonnay, a sauvignon blanc, and a “proprietary” red blend that’s probably human blood — just in time for the show’s imminent return.
We don’t know how the wine tastes yet — it goes on sale today — but the descriptions of the flavor (as well as those of the bottles) make it sound pretty perfect for a Sunday night viewing party:
In battle and to signify status, the noble houses of the Seven Kingdoms carry colorful banners displaying distinctive symbols. A sigil—an animal or object identified with the various houses—provided Cabral inspiration for the wines. House Lannister is represented by a Golden Lion—an accurate symbol for the regal, golden Game of Thrones 2016 Chardonnay, Central Coast ($19.99).
House Targaryen’s sigil is a Three-Headed Dragon, expressed in the multiple varietals which come together in the 2014 Red Blend, Paso Robles ($19.99). This wine is a blend of Syrah, Tempranillo and Petite Sirah, which lend fragrant aromas of black cherry, vanilla and cocoa and give the wine a lush, rich palate.
The sigil for House Stark is the Direwolf. This powerful alpha canine finds expression in the most prized wine of all, the 2014 Cabernet Sauvignon, Napa Valley ($49.99). The wine captures the essence of the archetype in a complex, balanced wine with classic structure and multiple layers of flavor.
Expect these bottles to decorate the apartments of the most die-hard Thrones fans you know. If that includes you, grab the wines while they last. They make perfect gifts and are probably also great if you’re sitting at home, watching the show, and drinking alone. In fact, they may be even better if you’re drinking alone because a) you don’t have to find your way home after, and b) the less people present, the less likely your shindig will turn into a mass murder.
