Colbert Returns, Admits To Getting His Butt Done

Editorial Director

Last night The Colbert Report returned from an abrupt suspension in production and Stephen Colbert immediately tackled the rumors swirling around his absence. No, he’s not dead. He’s not running for President. He wasn’t getting an nose job as suggested by “whatever part of that original person has not been dermabrased off of Joan Rivers’ skull.” This accusation did lead Colbert to owning up to the real reason for his disappearance though. You guessed it: @ss lift.

“The doctor’s cranked this thing so high and tight it can barely blink now,” Colbert admitted right before giving a heartfelt nod to his ailing mother, the real reason for the break. Full clip after the jump.

I’ve said it before, but just when you think you can’t love the guy even more…

Colbert Nation via Robo

Around The Web