As you may have heard, former crap pizza peddler and straight-up pimp Herman Cain mercifully “suspended” his hilarious circus of presidential campaign on Saturday. Why he suspended it instead of just ending it outright isn’t exactly clear — probably because by suspending it he can still take in donations from delusional supporters and have their contributions matched by the federal government (fiscal conservatism!) — but his campaign is unquestionably over, and in the course of closing his goodbye speech, Cain uttered what Stewart termed as “the greatest nine words ever spoken by an American politician.”
“I believe these words came from the Pokemon movie.”
I really don’t want to spoil what happened next, but it’s totally worth you taking the time to watch. Thanks for the memories, Herman Cain.
Herman Cain is probably balls deep in some side pus$y right now, isn’t he?