Deep Netflix: ‘China Strike Force,’ Starring Coolio As A Drug Smuggler Named ‘Coolio’

Editor-at-Large
09.24.15 6 Comments
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Astoria Films

The 2000 film China Strike Force, from Hong Kong director Stanley Tong (Super CopRumble in the Bronx), won my heart forever before I even watched a frame. It was a two-step process.

Step one: While spelunking in the deep, deep Netflix action movies archive one night, I spotted its box cover, which features a) the title; b) a picture of Mark Dacascos, best known as one of the stars of the live-action Double Dragon movie and the host of Iron Chef America; and c) a picture of Coolio. Color me intrigued. Color me very intrigued.

Step two: I rushed to Google — like, immediately — to find out more about the movie, where I was greeted with this description (emphasis mine):

Shanghai police Detectives Alex Cheung (Lee-Hom Wang) and Darren Tong (Aaron Kwok) stumble onto the massive cocaine smuggling operation of crime boss Tony Lau (Mark Dacascos) and attempt to take down Coolio (Coolio), the American dealer in his employ who is responsible for bringing the drugs into China. In the midst of the criminal activity, Alex gets engaged to the daughter of his superior, Sheriff Lin (Paul Chun), which adds personal tensions to an already heated case.

Did you catch the little slice of magic in there? China Strike Force is a movie that stars Coolio as a drug smuggler named Coolio. I have been thinking about this basically non-stop since I read it, and I have come to the conclusion that the only way it could be better is if another rapper had beaten him out for the role, but they kept the character name anyway. Examples include:

  • “… stumble onto the massive cocaine smuggling operation of crime boss Tony Lau (Mark Dacascos) and attempt to take down Coolio (DMX)”
  • “… stumble onto the massive cocaine smuggling operation of crime boss Tony Lau (Mark Dacascos) and attempt to take down Coolio (Ja Rule)”
  • “… stumble onto the massive cocaine smuggling operation of crime boss Tony Lau (Mark Dacascos) and attempt to take down Coolio (Skee-Lo)”

And so on. The point of all this being: I needed to see China Strike Force. And I did. And it was everything I could have hoped for and more. Allow me to explain.

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