Jimmy Kimmel’s Oscar Monologue Didn’t Unify The Country, But It Definitely Made Fun Of Matt Damon

02.26.17 10 months ago 3 Comments

Following Justin Timberlake’s spirited opening with his “Can’t Stop the Feeling” performance, Oscars host Jimmy Kimmel stressed he wasn’t the person to unite a heavily divided nation. For as everyone cannot forget, Donald Trump is the President of the United States, and his first month in office has been anything but unifying. Kimmel did, however, offer an olive branch to his own particular nemesis, actor and Manchester By the Sea producer Matt Damon. Which was rather big of Kimmel, considering he and Damon traded jabs on the red carpet and on Twitter beforehand.

“I’m not the man to unite this country,” Kimmel told the audience. “If every one of you took a minute to reach out to one person you disagree with. Someone you like, and have a positive, considerate conversation with — not as liberals or conservatives, as Americans — if we could all do that, we would make America great again. We really could. It starts with us. And tonight, in the spirit of heeling and bringing people together, I would like to bury the hatchet with someone I’ve had issues with.”

Cue the camera cut to a somber-looking Damon, who was sitting behind his film’s Oscar-nominated star, Casey Affleck.

“He’s a selfish person,” said Kimmel, “but Matt did something very unselfish and I want to commend him for it. For real. Matt, as you know, could have starred in Manchester By the Sea. He was the producer. It’s nominated for six Oscars, including lead actor, and he could have taken that lead actor part for himself, but he didn’t. He gave that role to Casey Affleck, his childhood friend. He handed what turned out to be an Oscar-caliber role over to his friend and made a Chinese ponytail movie instead.”

This feud is never going to end, and that’s wonderful.

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