This ‘The Karate Kid’ Edit Makes The Case That Daniel Was The True Bully

News Editor
08.24.15 12 Comments

This new look at the 1980s hallmark film The Karate Kid arrives courtesy of master mashup narrator J. Matthew Turner on YouTube. He spliced together the major conflict scenes throughout the beloved underdog movie and added his own commentary into the mix. As it turns out, we only thought Johnny was the bully of the movie. Instead, Turner shows us how Daniel Russo was the mastermind “sociopath” who destroyed everyone else in his path through a clever weakling ruse.

Turner ticks off the boxes as he makes the case for Daniel snaking his way into Johnny’s life, stealing his lady and picking fight after fight. He even enlists “child batterer” Mr. Miyagi to infiltrate “Johnny’s sacred place, the Cobra Kai studio.” Daniel continues to “harass Johnny in public with impunity.” Then Daniel busts into the climactic tournament where Johnny is defending his title. Daniel arrives as “a danger to himself and others as he doesn’t even understand that basic rules of engagement.” Not cool.

In the end, Daniel only wins the tournament by way of “the demon sorcerer, Miyagi.” When Daniel unfairly captures the title in a major upset, Johnny remains a good sport: “He lets go of his sadness at losing, subjugates his ego, and personally presents Daniel with his tainted blood-soaked trophy. May you choke on it in your wet dreams, you rotten little prick.” Turner left out the part where Johnny goes home to stroke his own voodoo doll, but otherwise, this is a pretty perfect reinterpretation of events. (Via BroBible and J. Matthew Turner)

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