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Pitbull Tells GQ That There Are Basically No Products He Won't Whore Himself Out For

By / 03.22.12

I’ve developed a mildly unhealthy obsession with Pitbull ever since I saw him perform with Chris Brown at the NBA All-Star game, a performance in which he, as Grantland describes, “dressed like John Cusack in Grosse Pointe Blank, mugged ferociously, callously switching out his precious lyrics in order to better pander to the collected NBA fandom.” In other words, it was quintessential Pitbull — shamelessly compromising his art for the sake of advancing his brand, and I loved it.

Now, typically, I, like most people, frown on such behavior — we all like to pull for the artists who maintain their “indie” cred, after all — but there’s something about Pitbull’s unabashed whoring that’s frankly quite endearing. I kind of want him to endorse all of the products known to man. I think that’d be kind of funny, actually. And based on a new GQ profile on him, that seems to be what he’s aiming for.

Along with Kodak, Bud Light, and Voli, Pit endorses Dr Pepper and Zumba Fitness, which builds workout programs around his music. He also has equity in these dissolvable tongue squares called Sheets Energy Strips. Last year he made a reported $6 million this way, being hiphop’s foremost shill. What his new songs sound like are the pages in a portfolio, or a really engaging PowerPoint presentation on synergistic potential.

“Look, Pitbull is a product. Don’t get it f*cked up—I’m a businessman. This industry is 90 percent business, 10 percent talent. It’s the people who think they’re talented, that their sh*t don’t stink, who get left behind…Two thousand nine was freedom, 2010 was invasion, 2011 was takeover, 2012 is grow wealth.”

Never stop whoring and referring to yourself in the third person, Pitbull. Never. Stop.


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