A lawn mower race erupted in violence this week when a man on a large lawnmower bumped into a smaller lawnmower after reaching the finish line. The man in the smaller mower jumped onto the other lawnmower, which was still in motion, and began punching the driver. Some spectators said they thought it was a planned stunt until other riders broke up the fight. The most shocking part of all this? Somehow this happened in New Zealand instead of at the last Uproxx company picnic (pictured above).
Speaking of New Zealand, a 44-year-old woman with sudden partial paralysis was admitted to an emergency room. It was found that a hickey on her neck had bruised an artery, kicking off a blood clot which caused a minor stroke. She recovered after anticoagulant therapy. Wait, a hickey can lead to a stroke? Well, between this and all the arrests I’m going to quit giving hickeys to seventh graders immediately.
Meanwhile, in Wisconsin, a cat named Almond has been living in a tree for the past seven months. The cat was born in the tree and stayed their when its mother and the other kittens left. A retired carpenter has been taking care of the cat, building it a little shelter and climbing a 12-foot ladder at least once a day to bring it food. In other strange news from America, Camel cigarettes in a custom “Williamsburg, Brooklyn” package have been selling out in the trendy neighborhood. Hipsters at first insulted the branding, but now they’re buying them up quickly, possibly “ironically”. Wish us luck in our next big business idea, Williamsburg-branded Russian Roulette Semi-automatic Handguns. Sure, we probably aren’t going to turn a profit by killing the customer base more quickly than cigarettes do, but sometimes it’s not about the money. It’s about the greater good.
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- Kiwis hold a ride-on mower race, as you do. It ends in fist fight, as they do. (Stuff)
- Hickey causes a stroke, which is a steep price for looking trashy. (BoingBoing)
- Cat who was born in a tree seven months ago still lives in it. (Arbroath, video here)
- Hipsters love cigarettes branded with the title of their overrated neighborhood. (GOOD)
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- A company specializing in making large cup-sized bras (why didn’t we think of that?) has announced they’re releasing an even larger cup size: the L cup, or as Newslite puts it, “That’s one L of a big bra.” Oh, you cheeky monkeys.
- Leo J. Powers of Massachusetts was arrested for possession of incendiary devices. No, he’s not a terrorist. He was blowing up snowbanks to avoid having to shovel the snow, and police say he has been successfully doing so for some time. As someone whose car was stuck in a snowbank last month, I’d like to shake this guy’s hand. Give ’em hell, Leo. (PatriotLedger)
- Awesome Headline of the Day: “Topless Female Van Masturbator Pleads Guilty To Minor Weapons Charge” (TheSmokingGun)
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- Facebook confirms they’ve raised $1.5 billion on a company valuation of $50 billion, say they expect to start filing public financial reports by April 30th of next year. (PRNewsWire via TheNextWeb)
- Research firm eMarketer is predicting social networks will receive 11% of all online U.S. advertisement spending this year. They also estimate Facebook will make $4 billion this year from worldwide ad spending, doubling what they made in 2010. (TechCrunch)
- Here’s a funny graph about the stages of a technology stock bubble. Um, completely unrelated, of course. (VisualLoop)
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