Fine, whatever:: Austin Aries vs. Sanada
Austin Aries wins, and talks a whole bunch about “Option C.” Man, do you remember what Option C was originally about? Also, where did Option A and B go? Did you try to find them? I mean, I guess Option A would have been to try to win the battle royal later in the night. But solely referring to the X-Division title as Option C pretty much demeans everything about it. Again. It holds no meaning other than a means to an end in July.
Impact goes back and forth between how important and revolutionary and legendary their the X-Division is, and treating it like it’s nothing. This week, every match has title ramifications. Kurt angle is arbitrarily booking matches, which means we can infer that he thinks so little of Sanada that instead of putting someone who wrestles in the X-Division and has been trying to get the title from him, he puts in Aries. That infers that Aries can easily beat him, then cash in the title at Destination X for yet another chance to take the belt off of Bobby Lashley, assuming he hasn’t lost it by then. Again, keeping in mind that Kurt can book whatever match that he wants, and can send Lashley through a gauntlet of opponents of his choosing at any time. That’s shady, but if he says he’s a good guy, it’s not.
the other problem is how easily Aries dispatches Sanada. Sanada goes for a moonsault, a perfectly acceptable thing to lose to, and Aries kicks out of it like nothing. We’re told on commentary that Aries must have gotten a knee or a leg up to block it, but watch that video. That motherf-cker didn’t get a damn thing up.
So to reiterate, heading into Destination X: the X-Division title means nothing, the most recent champion is a loser, and nobody in the X-Division is good enough to have been given a chance to take it off of him.
Worster worst: WHERE’S THE KITTY?
Worst: Bully Ray
Quick review of the face in this situation: He calls someone a bitch, the crowd cheers.
Everything else is just sad. Just like when he turned up his COOL DAD ROCK MUSIC on the way to stalk Dixie Carter at her office, namedropping WWE is…*gulp*. He’s so real, guys. He keeps it so real. I feel like he is one more office party away from turning into the Guy Fieri of wrestling. Now that you’ve pictured that in your imagination brain, you know I’m right.
*EDIT* Burnsy is the best:
Best: Maybe everything else though?
I will give a supplementary worst for Rhino blocking Spud out of the shot, because Background Spud is amazing and makes my world go ’round. But hey, at least we have EC3. EC3 who points out that Bully isn’t his family, Rhino’s family is in Detroit, and he’s paying Rhino so he can feed them. EC3 brings logic to the conversation, and we all know when he does that, according to Impact Wrestling, he’s the most evil of them all.
Worst: DID SOMEBODY SAY COOL DAD???
I want more like this!
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