“They all jumped off the bridge, so I’m going to do it too” may be a guiding mantra of pro wrestling, but just because everyone does something, doesn’t necessarily make it any good at all. There are a lot of wrestling moves that pretty much immediately kill a match’s credibility for me, and I’m not even talking about blatantly ridiculous stuff like the Canadian Destroyer, Unprettier or Santino’s snake arm. No, there’s a ton of common, could see it in any match moves that consistently look terrible or don’t make the slightest bit of sense if you think about them at all.
Here are 10 common moves that really need to stop being so damn common…
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10) Swinging Neckbreakers
Neckbreakers in general almost made this list since almost nobody bothers to do them properly. You’re supposed to bring your opponent’s neck down over your shoulder thus, you know, doing some sort of damage to his neck. Most of the time though, both guys just flop down onto their backs with the neckbreaker literally taking the exact same bump as the neckbreakee. Still, in theory, a regular neckbreaker is a fine, if kind of weak move.
Swinging neckbreakers also make sense in theory. Getting around behind somebody to perform a traditional neckbreaker is kind of awkward, so you grab ‘em from the front, and twist them into place for the neckbreaker. Okay, fine. Unfortunately in practice most swinging neckbreakers (including the move’s myriad Overdrive-style offspring) end up looking like two guys sort of awkwardly do-si-doing around each other before deciding to have a nice simultaneous lay down. Outside of moves that involve novelty dancing, there’s no common wrestling move that appears less damaging.
I can count the number of good hurricanranas I’ve seen on one hand. In ever other case, the guy just sort of spins around while his calves are on another guy’s shoulders, then that guy does a wacky front-flip, usually totally contrary to the momentum of the guy doing the hurricanrana.
Every time a new hot high flier hits the scene, I get a jolt of excitement. “Maybe this guy will do a hurricanrana that doesn’t look stupid”, I think, and every time I’m disappointed. Also, John Cena does hurricanranas now, so it’s value as a cool agile thing to do is officially stone dead.
Stop holding yourself stiff as a board and helpfully providing your balls for a handle, and you can probably get out of this.
8) Gorilla Press
This would be the easiest move in the world to escape from. Most guys look like they’re juuust on the edge of dropping their opponent the entire time anyways — the slightest struggle and you’d be able to slip free. Also, I know this isn’t the most enlightened statement, but this move features way too much protracted guys grabbing other guys by the chode action for my tastes.