Much To The Surprise Of No One, Hulk Hogan Says He Wants One Last Title Run

That’s right folks! Hulkamania wants to hobble wild all over you. The former 12-time world champion told the Sioux City Journal that he wants to make it a baker’s dozen now that he’s back with the WWE.

“My ego explodes when I get around the wrestling ring,” he says. “I get goosebumps. It’s like a hot car. I get the jones…and I want to be back.”

“Triple H told me I’ve got nothing to prove but the last time I wrestled was not with this company and I want my legacy to end with the WWE. I weigh 295. I’m in really good shape and I’m training like I’m going to get in the ring. I’m like a convict given a life sentence.”

Now, we all know how the Hulkamachine is fueled on tall tales and gross exaggerations, especially since that one time he bodyslammed the seventeen-tonne Andre The Giant, killing him instantly. But Hogan seems confident that it could really happen:

“It could happen,” Hogan says proudly. “Vince (McMahon, the WWE founder) said, ‘Never say never.’ And that’s what I want – one last match, one last run, one last title win, one last title retirement.”

“Thanks to social media, I’m hotter than I was in the ‘80s and ‘90s,” he says. “When I go through airports now, young kids – 4 and 5 years old – will come up to me and say, ‘You’re my favorite wrestler’ and I don’t even wrestle anymore. But they see (the matches) on the Internet and they know what I can do.

“If this all works out,” Hogan says of his return to the WWE, “Hulk will really become immortal. It’s where my home is. It’s where I belong.”

I feel like statements like that are wholly indicative of the dangerous mindset that keeps wrestlers getting into a ring long after it’s time to hang up their boots for good. If we’ve learned one thing from Hogan, however, it’s that the Real American is Real Good at reaching into that well of nostalgia that never seems to dry up. We always seem to think things are impossible in the WWE, but then we see the Rock beat CM like it’s nothing, or Sting in the middle of Vince McMahon’s ring.

At the end of the day, Vince McMahon’s “never say never” realistically just means “never underestimate what I will do as a loony old man.” He’s just gonna need a lot of prayer and even more vitamins to make this one work.

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