Welcome back to the Total Divas recaps! We apologize that the second episode recap was delayed, but there were Thanksgiving reasons. The good news is that means you can look forward to TWO Total Divas episode recaps this week! You can find our recap of the season six premiere right here if you need to get caught up, and you can find our Total Bellas recaps over here.
On with the show!
Last week, it was WrestleMania times, and the Divas got renamed “Superstars.” Only in WWE, though. Not on Total Divas, the show with that name. Also, Maryse was revealed as forever enemy of the Bella Twins.
This week, we start with the Monday after WrestleMania in Dallas, also known as “the shittiest wrestling fans of the year.” Nattie Natsplains about how the day after WrestleMania is the beginning of new storylines for the year, and how no one really knows for sure what’s going to happen. Like how we STILL don’t know why Shane McMahon wound up with control of a brand, for example.
Maryse shows up backstage (and Renee greets her with a big “nice knockers”) and Nattie gets bent out of shape, because she thought Maryse was just hanging around for Mania and would be hitting the bricks or pounding sand or whatever it is the French do. She goes to ICE COLD MARK CARRANO to immediately snitch on Maryse hanging out in the locker room. He tells Nattie to chillax, essentially. Nattie is fretting about the “two spots” opening up with the Bellas out, worrying that neither will be used to promote her. She’s right!
Nattie, Lana and Naomi watch backstage as Maryse shows up to slap Zack Ryder’s dad. I had honestly totally forgotten that’s how she re-debuted, but of course I also hadn’t thought about it too hard. Nattie seems pleased.
Oh and now we’re suddenly jumping forward in the timeline to TWO MONTHS LATER. At Nattie’s house, you can see Jim Neidhart’s balls.
Apparently, shot putting is one of Jim’s passion, and he is finally getting a chance to teach Nattie and her sister how to shot put. They head out in the backyard and Jim is just starting to explain how you have to scream when you’re throwing the shot put, but Lana won’t stop calling Nattie and asking her for advice and tips. It’s driving Nattie up the wall, which is in stark contrast to earlier seasons when it drove her up the wall that people wouldn’t ask her for advice. It’s almost as though there’s no pleasing her!
Elsewhere, Brie and NIkki meet for coffee and Nikki breaks the news that they’ll both be on the cover of Latina magazine! Score!