It seems they’ve let the dog out of the cage…for now.
Some years ago, Darkman X was under the cocaine-induced delusion that getting arrested was a sport of some sort. His determination and resolve to not lose at this game pushed him to accrue well over a dozen sets of handcuffs before finally landing behind bars.
By golly, he had a spectacular run before they caught him. Seriously, dude’s criminal record is freaking phenomenal and chock full of goodies his kids can brag about during recess. You see, X likes to compound his criminal buffooneries. So he wont just get caught speeding. That’s what regular people do. X is extraordinary. He’ll carry cocaine and guns on him while speeding through and airport, crashing through gates and cars, before pretending to be a federal officer while carjacking a civilian. Why go through all that trouble? Because that’s what Ruff Ryders do, bitch.
And that’s just one of very many Earl Simmons escapades. Some were comical, some tragic, but all were criminal offenses punishable by law. Which is basically how he got holed up in Tent City.
But he’s out now.
Why they only gave him 90 days is really the true magical wonder of the Arizona legal system. We should just rejoice that the prodigal son is back home. X once provided the much needed adrenaline and energy in Hip-Hop that has been administered by the likes of 2Pac, MOP, Lil Jon and Busta Rhymes. Granted, he’s back to talking about his religious renaissance and all that jazz, but we hope he still has it in him (pause) to put out profanity laced, Hip-Hop-mosh-pit stupidity over the hardest beats ever like only his barking self can.
Welcome home Earl.
Previously Posted — Video: DMX Curses Out Miami Judge
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