7. Go On Your Birthday
For some reason, people love watching other people get denim scrubs and they show this voyeuristic desire during birthdays. Go on your born day (bonus if you go on your 21st) and your loser friends will be spending money on you and enjoy it like they’re getting sympathy boners. If you get them to pool their money like a potluck, they may even get enough for you to go all way in a champagne room or something. And what to do when you’re there is a lesson for another day.