Here’s my goal in life: to become the second coming of Spike Lee. Basically, that means having an insanely successful career in whatever craft I choose while being a professional sports fan in the process. It’s the weekend so there’s not much else to talk about other than sports and Bank of America trying to make me pay to spend my own money. Since athletics are obviously more exciting to discuss, let’s keep the discussion moving in that direction. All credit goes to @tr3yball for these questions. I’m a sucker for stuff like this, but do feel free to leave your own answers. Ready? Go!
1. Who is your all-time favorite championship team in any sport?
The 1992-1993 Chicago Bulls. Jordan vs. Barkley. Two superstars at the peak of their careers. One gunning for his first ring, and the other attempting to cement himself in history with the ever-difficult three peat. It wasn’t the classic case of “all-or-nothing,” but the ’93 Finals was pretty damn close. Plus, Mike averaged 41-9-6-2 that series. I couldn’t do that on 2K if you put the settings on rookie.
A close second would be the 1993-1994 Dallas Cowboys followed by the MonSTARS, better known as the 2001-2002 Miami Hurricanes. It takes a lot as a Florida State fan openly admit that.
2. What player’s poster did you have on your wall as a child?
Aside from the obligatory Jordan poster, Deion Sanders.
3. What’s one NFL team you would get rid of right now?
I’d go with the Seahawks, but the city of Seattle has suffered enough. So I say stop prolonging the inevitable and get rid of the Jacksonville Jaguars and ship them to Los Angeles. We all know it’s coming anyway. It’s like Justin Bieber’s impending weed charge.
4. What’s one player you cannot stand in any sport?
I respect dude’s game, moxie and the fact he’ll go down as one of the greatest Celtics ever, but Paul Pierce. Game 7 of the 2008 semis still stings and his Academy Award winning performance in Game 1 of the ’08 Finals was pure bullish*t.
Running neck and neck with “The Truth” is DeAngelo Hall.
5. What’s one word you would use to describe Kobe Bryant?
6. Finish this sentence: Baseball is ______.
An acquired taste.
7. What’s your favorite sports memory of all time?
The easy answer would be any Bulls or Cowboys title run. Yet, and I swear this isn’t to win brownie points or make someone teary eyed, but during Christmas ’97 I received Madden 64 for the Nintendo 64. Myself and my Uncle John, who took off work and came in town for the holidays, stayed up two straight days playing the game. He would tell me which plays to pick while I actually ran them – he never understood how to operate the controller – and we damn near finished the entire season. A year later, he died of colon cancer and I really haven’t gotten into Madden heavily since. Moments such as that make life worth living.
Enough of the Lifetime answers though, my all time favorite sports memory is the USC/Texas Rose Bowl. Still the greatest college football game I’ve ever witnessed. Usain Bolt circa 2008 Olympics was cool too because it was like watching Cool Runnings happen in real life, except it wasn’t bobsledding. Most unique? The Pacers/Pistons brawl. Leaving a Lil Scrappy and Fabolous concert at Old Dominion University, a friend called and demanded I get near a TV proclaiming “I’d never believe what the f*ck I was about to watch.” He was right. Stephen Jackson’s haymakers were Mortal Kombat-esque.
8. If you could play a sport professionally, what would it be?
I love them both equally, and I really, really do, but basketball edges out football by a millimeter. I’ll always have fond memories of my grandmother leaving sticky notes on the bathroom mirror of Bulls games from the night before when my mom would make me go to sleep because of school the next morning. She’d post the final score along with Jordan and Pippen’s stats. Stuff like that ties you to a game more than people will ever realize. And do you know how many times I reenacted the last 35 seconds of Game 6 of the 1998 NBA Finals at the neighborhood court growing up? A whole f*cking lot.
I won’t lie to you though. Ken Griffey’s batting stance and The Sandlot had me wanting to be a professional baseball player for the longest time.
9. Will you miss the NBA this season (should there be a non-NBA)?
Don’t toy with my emotions. I’m already unstable enough as is just thinking of the possibility. Myself with no NBA is like Martin with no Gina, cereal with no milk, scrambled eggs with no cheese and Rick Ross with no shades.
10. You line up to run the 40-yard dash. What’s your time?
The fastest 5.5 you will ever witness in life.
11. What is one sports venue you want to visit before you die?
I damn near said Madison Square Garden, but sitting court side at a Duke/UNC game at Cameron Indoor Stadium must be done at least once.
12. Who will win the 2011 World Series?
I honestly have no clue. Baseball, especially postseason baseball, is weird. That’s the one sport I swear voodoo takes over once the playoffs start. I wouldn’t mind seeing the Brewers win it all, making Prince Fielder’s eventual deflection to a bigger market that much more bittersweet. But, it’s the Brewers and as great as they were in the regular season, it wouldn’t surprise me if they coughed up a lung in October. What I’m really pissed is that St. Louis and Philly won’t meet in the NLCS.
13. What’s the one food that MUST be at a football tailgate?
No disrespect to hot dogs, but I’m a hamburger man. Give me some patties, buns, ketchup and mustard and I’ll be good money for the rest of the tailgate. You can wing it with almost anything else, especially if you want to get really fancy and incorporate baked beans and/or potato salad. Beverage wise, there has to be a surplus of beer. Tailgates and no beer is like church and no lady with an outrageous hat.
14. How many titles will LeBron James win before he retires?
The stan in me says not one, not two, not three, not four, not five…well, you get where I’m heading. Realistically though, three. To get there, however, he has to get one first. Seeing as how I do not envision this Miami team will be together for a long period of time based off how this NBA lockout will eventually pan out, I say he gets one, possibly two in Miami and another once he moves on to another team. I’d gun for four or five, but there’s something about this Kevin Durant guy that doesn’t seem to be fading away anytime soon.
I hope we get at least two James Vs. Durant NBA Finals just so I can write about them. And, of equal importance, we still need that LeBron Vs. Kobe Finals. That needs to happen next season, especially coming off a work stoppage, because it is now the NBA’s version of Mayweather/Pacquiao.
15. What one player’s jersey is hanging in your closet right now?
16. Watch a big game at home or at a sports bar?
Here’s the trick. Invite mad people over. Afford them the choice of either donating five dollars for pizza or bring alcohol. I guarantee that pops off every time. You get the feel of a bar, but in the confines of your own house/apartment.
17. Will Pacquiao and Mayweather ever fight?
Yep, sometime in 2012. And when Mayweather whoops that ass, what will the Floyd detractors say then?
18. If Peyton Manning’s career is done, does he rank top five or top 10 at quarterback?
Damn good question. If Peyton Manning never plays again, he’s still top five of all time in my book. Brett Favre, Joe Montana, John Elway, Peyton Manning and Tom Brady, in no particular order, are the quartet of best signal callers I’ve seen play the game. I never witnessed Unitas or Terry Bradshaw play so miss me with the “you’re an idiot, how could you leave (insert player) off?” complaints. And for as wickedly absurd as Dan Marino’s stats are, there’s something about those five that separate him from the bunch.
Unless, of course, his Super Bowl in the first Ace Ventura movie counts.
19. You get 10 shots from the NBA three-point line. How many do you make?
In a pickup game (which I haven’t played in Lord knows how long), probably four. I’m more of a midrange, drive to the basket kind-of-guy anyway. Yes, this results in a lot of elbows to the head and bloody lips, but a little blood on the court never scared anybody unless you’re Karl Malone trying to guard Magic. If we’re talking wide open shots, six.
20. You get a free trip to any sports Hall Of Fame, which do you choose?
Oh, no question, the NFL’s. I hear Canton is one of those places that’s impossible to prepare yourself for because of the sheer history the place embodies. And it’s more than just statutes of former players, the entire story of the game is there. I really want to see if Deion Sanders statue is as funny looking in person as it was on TV.
21. Duke basketball or UNC basketball?
The sky is Carolina blue for a reason. That’s God’s favorite team. And mine too.