COUGARS: Yet Another Six Pack Of 50-Year-Olds More F***worthy Than Madonna

05.07.14 4 years ago 41 Comments

kris jenner cougars lead

We’re four installments in, and still having no problems finding cougars we’d rather give the old salsiccia before Madonna. While Madge was busy calling her son a nigga, and walking around looking like Justin Bieber’s reanimated corpse these ladies were out in the world prospering, and inspiring MILF fantasies.

Check out the previous entries in our COUGARS series here.

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1. Kris Jenner, 58

She’s literally the mother of all Kardashians. At 58, she’s still pulling off Wonder Woman costumes with ease, giving Kanye, French Montana, and that Patrick Bateman lookalike something to look forward to when they and their respective spouses/girlfriends make it to rocking chair age.

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2. Judge Marilyn Milian, 52

Don’t act like we’re the first one to wonder what’s happening under this Cuban beauty’s judicial gown.

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3. Christie Brinkley, 60

The Total Gym works! How else could Christie Brinkley continue to put women 30 years her junior to shame? At age 60, she could still drink for free at the douchiest table of bottle service baron investment bankers in NY without anyone passing a judgmental glance.

4. Judge Lynn Toler, 54

Can’t you just hear her resonant voice echoing throughout the halls as you make a visit to her *ahem* chambers? We would never divorce Judge Lynn.

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5. Lisa Rinna, 50

The former Dancing With The Stars contestant, and soap opera mainstay is still rocking bikini’s with confidence, and turning heads.

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6. Mariska Hargitay, 50

Best known for her role as hard-nosed detective Olivia Benson on Law & Order: SVU, Mariska should know she isn’t the only one with handcuffs. Elliot’s married, so if you’re looking for a new partner, just let us know.

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