Ah, yes, September football. The records are all the same. The weather is still comfortable. And potential still trumps the depressing reality that usually sets in around Week 7 that your squad is free-falling to yet another disappointing season.
Opening weekend in the NFL is sort of like a spiritual experience. Fans don their team’s colors, partake in rituals that only make sense to like-minded cult followers and somewhere in the middle we all get hammered and eat food fresh off the grill. Those things, we know, will happen.
The following 12 highly educated guesses however? We’re not 100% positive, but we feel mighty confident in our multiple hypotheses. Will they piss some of you off? Of course, but it’s football season. Man up. It’s going to get a lot worse than this as the weeks go by anyway.