Love According To Pretty Toney: The Ghostface Valentine’s Collection

02.14.11 6 years ago 27 Comments
ghostface killah valentine's day cards

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Ghostface’s writing ability has been highly touted as providing some of the most vivid and honest lyrics of any other musician in Hip-Hop. One aspect of his career that is often overlooked is his ability to convey a multitude of different emotions in regards to the opposite sex. He’s quite…poetic and, at times, touching.

After being engrossed in some of his most sensitive lyrics, we thought it would be fitting for the Valentine season to put Pretty Toney’s heartfelt sentiments on to some holiday cards, crafted with assistance from Talia. Using Ghost’s rhymebook as our inspiration, we’ve created some serious Hallmark moments here, people.

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On Honesty – Too many men stunt to women as if they’re perfect, but when the dust settles their lies ruin the poor ladies. If you’re trying to be upfront and offer your imperfections to your potential soulmate, this card is for you.

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On Attraction – Sometimes you just gotta f*ck something. And if that something isn’t there, then you just have to settle for your lover. Make that lady feel special by letting her know that, of all the mistresses in the Rolodex, she’ll be the one getting the strudel.

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On Treating That Someone Right – Being a good man or woman is difficult. We try to be great for our significant other, but we just can’t do it sometimes. Just look over this card to learn how to be a fantastic lover.

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On Vacations – Nothing sparks romance in a relationship like a getaway. Invite your lady to go to a special spot, granted she knows where to put the joint.

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On Needs and Wants – The direct approach is the best. Don’t beat around the bush. Tell her what you want down to the most minute, anatomical detail.

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On Communication – It’s always good to give fair warning when that magical coital moment is

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On Frugality – The best part of love is being together through the tough times. When you’re worried about her spending, just slide this note to her to remind her that it’s important to save.

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On Dirty Talk – Sometimes, you just have to tell her what you’re going to do and how you’re going to do it. This card is a bonus of she’s in med school.
Ghostface’s Apollo Kids is available now on iTunes.

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