The NBA Playoffs Begin Today And The City Of Toronto Has Drawn First Blood

04.19.14 4 years ago 34 Comments

In a little over an hour, the best and most stressful time of the year tips off with Game 1 between Atlantic Division foes Toronto and Brooklyn. Let’s just say the people of the OVO capital of the world aren’t exactly shying away from the matchup either, evident by today’s front page of the Toronto Sun.

As a word of warning to the Sun, confidence is great. And any unprovoked shot at Paul Pierce is a well-deserved shot. But here’s a word of advice however. Don’t take The Truth and Garnett’s ages as a sign they’re going to roll over and die. It’s all a trap.


A guy who’s had his heartbroken by Paul Pierce on more than 12 occasions

Bonus: Dammit, Toronto. I’m not going to say I told you so, but…yeah. Yeah. Anywho, today must be the inaugural National Put Your Foot In Your Mouth Day in T-Dot because Raptors GM Masai Ujiri shouted “F*ck Brooklyn” at a pre-game rally outside the Air Canada Centre. Ujiri, who does not hide his disdain for the Nets, admitted at halftime, “Just trying to get the crowd out there rattled — wrong choice of words. I apologize to kids out there and to the Brooklyn guys. Nothing against them. Just trying to get our fans going. That’s it.”

Completing the face palm trifecta, Drake took at shot at frienemey, Brooklyn native and one-time owner of the Nets, Jay Z. Rob Ford could not be reached for contact, which really, really, really is a shame when you think about it.

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