Your Week 9 NFL Recap

11.09.09 8 years ago 22 Comments

Before we get to the games I gotta vent first.

Screw you Rookwood Tap and, for that matter, screw you all Wrigleyville bars from the heart of the brojects on Clark and Addison. Screw your buffet with the cardboard eggs, death to your pouty waitresses (though I appreciate the fake boobs,) screw you for not having coffee and screw you for having a bathroom attendant at a sports bar. And a special fuck you for playing country music during the commercials. Could I at least get some Black Eyed Peas?

I don’t know if it was my hatred that rubbed off on the Bears or just their own mediocrity coming to the forefront, but the Monsters of the Midway got rolled by the visiting Cardinals. The Cards moved the ball at will against the beaten down Bears D with Larry Fitzgerald serving notice as to why he’s the best wide receiver in the game. He dominated whomever the Bears threw at him in single coverage and, if he wasn’t open, Kurt Warner was finding someone else. With a brutal schedule up ahead, the Bears look headed for under .500 and Lovie Smith looks like he’s on his way out.

The best game of the day was the late afternoon tilt between San Diego and the New York Giants. Simply put, the Giants played soft in this game, unable to seal the game with 1st and goal from the four yard line and allowing the sunshine boys from SD to drive all over them with less than two minutes left for the winning score. The only thing more shocking than the Giants sitting at 5-4 after a 5-0 start is how unbelievably bad at football LaDainian Tomlinson has become. With 12 carries for 22 yards, LT is now on pace for 550 rushing yards at 3.2 a clip. He could be out of the league next year.

And finally, LC can take solace in the fact the 2008 Detroit Lions will continue to have gone where no team has gone before. Yes the Tampa Bay Buccaneers – behind the power of their creamsicle jerseys – upset the enigmatic Packers, ensuring that every team has at least one win. No word on whether Matt Millen and Rod Marinelli clinked champagne glasses.

Other News and Notes

— The undefeated Saints and Colts held on, but not without some stiff competition. Indianapolis was an easy field goal away from overtime as for the second straight week, they struggled at home. Up next? Brady-Manning XI.

— The Dolphins gave Brady’s Pats all they could handle, but Randy Moss was the difference. His embarrassment of Vontae Davis on the game-winning TD is the play of the year for the Patriots.

— In case you still had doubts, the Bengals are for real. Of course it helps that Ochocinco’s bribing the refs.

— Can the Titans make it from 0-6 to the playoffs? Gotty™ is still leading the prayer circle after the Titans upset the 49ers in their own back yard. Vince Young for mayor of Cashville. (Gotty’s™ NoteChris Johnson for mayor; Vince for Sgt. At Arms.)

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