Oh boy oh boy oh boy. From the Smoking Gun:
In a police interview following his arrest last week, Mike Tyson told cops he smokes cocaine that he packs into Marlboro cigarettes, is unable to roll his own joints, and gets "a little crazy" without the use of the antidepressant Zoloft.
Oh yes, friends, it's a doozy. You must read the whole thing to appreciate it. My favorite part comes at the end of Officer J.R. McKnight's report:
I then thanked Mike for being cooperative, Mike said he was a pretty cool guy. I then told Mike that people in my town would start yelling at me. Mike then changed his voice and looked down at the ground saying, "Fuck you, I hate you, fuck you, dead beat, fuck you."
What a terrifying exchange that must have been. "Hey, thanks for cooperating instead of punching us into oblivion and eating our cartilage." "Yeah, I'm a pretty cool–RAWWRRR!!" Yikes. Sounds like somebody's ready for his Zoloft-pot-cocaine-cigarette cocktail… And by somebody, I mean me.