Who works on Mayor Mark Mallory's staff? Is it a team of chimpanzees that uses a focus group of special ed students? Step 1: Embarrass yourself with the worst ceremonial first pitch in history. Step 2: Attempt to rehabilitate image with appearance on national talk show…
…by throwing the second-worst ceremonial pitch in history. How is someone so uncoordinated able to sign his name on bills and laws? Does he use a big red crayon and just mark an "X"? This guy would have to chop down a redwood with his bare hand in order to get me to vote for him. Then I wouldn't vote for him, because redwoods are some of our most beautiful natural resources. Don't you agree that these majestic trees have a calming effect?
Can you tell that I'm sensitive and I love nature? You wanna make out? I've been practicing with my stuffed animals.
I want more like this!
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