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ENGLISH FOOTBALLERS ARE AWESOME, DRUNK

By 06.19.07

Chelsea centre back and the captain of England's national team John Terry got married to 24-year-old Toni Poole (pictured) this weekend, and the bride insisted that former Commodores singer and Nicole-adopter Lionel Richie perform at the happy couple's reception.  Richie performed for a mere £250,000 (half a million bucks), and the friends of the groom — some of the best and highest-paid soccer players in the world — got their money's worth by heckling Richie (via Deuce of Davenport)

After his first song, the former Commodores singer had to ask guests to pipe down. 'It was really embarrassing,' says one onlooker. 'Toni was looking very anxious about the lads making a real fool of her.  'When he started singing Hello the boys started chanting back to him as if they were on the football ground terraces.'

Now see, that's a healthy relationship John and Toni have.  She wants Lionel Richie?  Give her Lionel Richie.  But assert your place in the marriage by destroying her idea of a perfect wedding.

I'd also like to use this post as a platform to encourage everyone to watch the video for "Hello".  It is truly a masterpiece of American cinema, the sort of thing that everyone should watch every couple of months to remind you of our country's greatness — like Lawrence Taylor snapping Joe Theismann's leg.


TAGSCHELSEA BLUESSOCCER

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