CURTIS GRANDERSON FIELDS WELL
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BRIAN URLACHER = LORD OF THE DANCE

By / 07.08.07

Brian Urlacher baby momma Tyna Robertson claims she is receiving some nasty text messages from the Pro Bowl linebacker:

"Go to hell you f—— —-." "Grow the f— up and quit praying and get a job." "You're a f—— fruit cake." "Your raising a little p—y."

Hmm, that's interesting.  Urlacher or whoever sent those texts used the contraction "you're" correctly in the third transmission, but not in the fourth. This lends weight to the argument of Urlacher's lawyer that Robertson's assertions are "self-serving fiction", because we all know today's NFL players speak and write English with expert precision. Also, Robertson appears to enjoy blackmail:

Robertson, a former exotic dancer who has been accused of shaking down men for money, has had court trouble with another famous man she once dated — "Lord of the Dance" star Michael Flatley. In 2003, she accused Flatley of raping her in Las Vegas, and sued him for $35 million. That case was tossed out of court.

I'm not saying that the judge was right to toss that case out, but I will say I find it hard to believe Michael Flatley enjoys exotic dancers. No self-respecting professional would woo an amateur, no matter how gifted that amateur was. I'm a decent softball player, but Jennie Finch would probably never let me up on the mound (especially with the restraining order still on the books). But who knows? Maybe the Lord of the Dance likes to slum with members of the plebeian class. Just not female members. -KD

Via the Fanhouse


TOPICS#NFL
TAGSBRIAN URLACHERNEEDS MORE HOT COEDS

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