Remember last week when I telegrammed Norman, OK and Austin, TX to remind their football squads that they were in the Big 12 and not in the Big Ten, and thus were not allowed to lose to just any team. I received many emails regarding the humor of that line that read something like "Good one, KD" or "You're funny for a Dutch-Irishman" (Note: No complimentary emails were actually received). That wasn't a joke sexy readers, as the final tallies of the Middle West's 11-team conglomeration of fecal matter attests.
First, Illinois defeated #5 Wisconsin. And you thought you buried Chief Illiniwek at Wounded Knee. Well you were wrong. Really wrong. And by 'you', I mean 'me'. And by 'really wrong', I mean 'the Badgers will cover'. Then lowly Northwestern bested mighty Michigan State. Perhaps East Lansing's athletic squads should shed the Spartan nickname and adopt the name of that other tribe of Greeks that pussed out in The 300 – the Achaeans, I think? Can #23 Purdue upset #4 Ohio State? My pocketbook is strangely quiet on the subject. -KD
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