Because of my high I.Q. and childhood of rigorous spelling bee training, I never got into pro wrestling. So I don't know who Harrison "Hardbody" Norris is… but I do know that he's led a pretty sweet life. Right now a jury is deliberating a federal case against him on prostitution and sex trafficking charges. Get ready for some awesome sentences:
Donned in his bright orange prison jumpsuit and trademark braids, Norris, serving as his own lawyer, gave a rambling, 90-minute performance in hopes of winning an acquittal on charges he kept nine women as sex slaves in his two Cartersville homes. If convicted, he faces up to 20 years in prison on a slew of charges, including peonage and forced labor.
[Prosecutors] painted Norris as a predator who knowingly used his wrestling business to lure poor and vulnerable women into a life of prostitution and forced labor… Some of the activity crossed state lines and involved so-called "cut parties" in which the alleged victims were forced to have sex with multiple partners in a single gathering.
I always learn the most useful things from news stories. Like this one. Not only did I get fresh spank bank material by Googling "cut parties," I also learned that luring vulnerable women into prostitution and forced labor was illegal. Who knew? Guess I'll have to free my sex slaves. But at least I can keep them on as sex share croppers.