I'd like to take this opportunity to say "you're welcome" for not covering Roger Clemens's appearance on Capitol Hill yesterday. And I'd still be ignoring it right now if Big League Stew hadn't turned up this little nugget from Brian McNamee's deposition.
Roger showed up after golf, I believe. Maybe he was golfing. I don't know if he was golfing. He might have showed up a little bit later, but no, he was there the whole time for the most part. He was in the house. I could tell a specific story about him being there, which was involving Jose (Canseco), Jose's wife and Roger's wife when they went inside, when the guys showed up. I mean, they talked — no disrespect, but they talked about how great Jose's wife's augmentation job was to Debbie and showed her. And then Debbie showed her her augmentation job.
That story would be sexy as hell if it were anybody besides the washed-up wives of two meathead juicers. This movie needs to be re-cast with Megan Fox and Kate Beckinsale as the wives. And I'll need to make some changes to the script, too. Like the Clemens and Canseco characters, for example. They're redundant, and can be fused into one character. Ably played by me. Rated R for Ridiculously sexy.