Note: I don't know what that headline means, but it's got a gynecological term in there, so let's lead with the Spurs.
NBA — Down by 20 halfway into the third quarter, the Lakers looked cooked against San Antonio. Then LA was all, "Hey Kobe Bryant, can you do that thing where you're the best basketball player on Earth?" Bryant, who had only 2 points on 1-3 shooting at the half, cranked out 25 in the second, and 14 in the decisive fourth quarter as the Lakers won 89-85. Mmmmm-MM! Try some of this hatred, it's delicious.
Soccer — I'm not a fan of Chelsea or Manchester United, but holy hell that was an incredible Champions League title game. Man U won 6-5 on penalty kicks after a 1-1 draw, but the real joy was watching the two best pro teams in the world (probably) play fast, aggressive, precise, and physical soccer for 120 minutes. Even if you hate soccer — and I know many of you do — there's something to be appreciated in the best two competitors duking it out in an epic match. Kinda like lesbian sex that way.
MLB — People are still running and throwing and hitting and catching. Not much going on, just the White Sox winning their seventh in a row. Oh, and Brandon Webb came up short in his bid to go 10-0. He gave up three whole runs in seven innings. What a loser.